Thursday, March 27, 2008

Jis' So Ya Know

Doin' ok today. Still lonely. But I woke up with a thought today... This is IT.

This is the real thing. This is what being a believer is all about. Nothing I say or feel surprises Him. So I woke up lonely. And guess what? I had Someone to discuss the loneliness with, Someone to take it to. It's still there, but Jesus is carrying it... and me.

Isn't that good? Isn't it good that every moment my heart is held by God Himself? Isn't it good that He understands even the stuff that I can't express?

I gotta admit, there's a dread in the pit of my stomach at the idea of facing this day in and day out. Looking at the long term responsibility that falls on my shoulders alone is staggering. BUT... I don't have to deal with the long term all at once. I simply have to breathe this breath. And the next. Just today.

And today, Jesus is enough. He will be enough tomorrow too.

2 comments:

frabjouspoet said...

In Spanish, they have 2 words for "to be". One word (soy) means to be something permanent or unchanging. The other word (estoy) means to be something for now. Your loneliness is for now. Your spirit is with you for the long haul. :)

I remind myself of this distinction regularly.

Mary said...

It will get better, but you are so right on...He is enough now, and enough later.

I am so looking forward to our visit!