Just for fun, and because I can't sleep...
Lately I've noticed a rash of ridiculous signs. You know, papers posted up with warnings or requests of various kinds. They make me laugh.
In a French quarter jewelry store: "PLEASE DO NOT TRY ON THE TOE RINGS."
Just picture it. Somebody walks in a jewelry store after walking around the quarter for a while. Probably wearing sandals. They spot a toe ring. "Mmmmm.... I like this. Wonder if it'll look good on me." Then they proceed to try to balance on one foot while they figure out which toe...
In a beauty salon restroom: "PLEASE DO NOT SLAM THE TOILET SEAT DOWN."
OK... most of the clientele in salons are women. Have they been lifting the seat? Is this sign for the men? Who is disturbed by the seat slamming? Is there a certain individual seat slammer, and the sign has been posted as if seat slamming were a chronic problem, but in reality is a way to get across a message without directly confronting the habitual slammer? I must admit, it's a conversation I'd dread. "Hey, listen... can you do something about the toilet seat? I mean the way you slam it down... it just really... I'm not trying to hurt your feelings or anything... just could you please not slam it down? I mean, the slamming noise... it's so... slammy."
On a potted plant outside a place of business on Carrollton: "PLEASE DO NOT SIT ON PLANTS."
Wouldn't your butt get dirty from the potting soil? Wouldn't you be afraid of squishing the leaves? Are there plant sitters out there just waiting for me to put a potted plant out? Is my hydrangea in danger out there in front of the house?
I have to wonder... are these signs effective? Has there been a drastic reduction in toe ring fittings, toilet seat slamming, and plant sitting? I mean, if they work, then why am I not using signs?? If horrible behaviors such as plant sitting could be stopped, just think what misery I could end by posting a sign.
"KEEP YOUR NEGATIVE OPINION TO YOURSELF"
or how about
"CHOCOLATE DONATIONS ARE ENCOURAGED"
or maybe
"RETURN THE TV REMOTE TO THE SAME PLACE EVERY TIME"
OH! Here's one:
"DOING WHAT I SAY IS REQUIRED. ADMITTING THAT I'M RIGHT IS OPTIONAL."
A girl can dream, can't she?? :) Anyway, the sign idea and it's absurdity has been a fun source of entertainment for my brain tonight. I really, really should be sleeping. Here's one more sign:
"SHHHHH!! Mommy sleeping!! DO NOT DISTURB!"
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
At Least Milk
Motherhood certainly has its um... adventurous moments. Tonight I had just such a moment at band rehearsal. Riverside Church, where I play keys, has a sweet new music director. He started just a week or so after Caleb was born. This evening he and I were having a conversation regarding a song for Sunday. I was sitting there calmly discussing a nuance of the music when...
My milk let down.
EVERY mother who has ever nursed a baby just cracked up. And I'm not even to the good part yet. For everyone who has NOT nursed a baby, the "let down" is a reflex in a nursing mother's body that causes milk to be pretty much forced out. It usually happens when the baby is nursing, but sometimes can be triggered by other things, like too much time away from the baby, a thought of the baby or another crying baby. It's a very cool thing God built into a female in order to ensure proper nourishment for her infants. It is not, however, all that cool to experience letdown when one is not nursing, but is in conversation with a new music director, or any other person for that matter.
So the milk let down without warning, and suddenly, midsentence, I feel the drips. That's right. Drips. I look down and sure enough, white drops were coming through my shirt and splashing onto my lap. It looked as if... well... as if there was milk coming out of me, dripping through my shirt and onto my lap. It didn't help to have a black shirt on, which effectively highlighted the white substance dripping off of me.
Uh... WHAT do you say at a time like this??? Do I excuse myself? Do I attempt to make an explanation? Do we both sit there and act like nothing's happening?
I managed a "Oops, I'm dripping. Sorry." and quickly crossed my arms, hoping to slow the flow if you know what I mean. I have no clue if new music guy caught what I said or even noticed what happened. Part of me dares to dream he didn't notice. Part of me knows he probably did and is probably embarrassed to pieces. I mean, I really don't know this guy too well. He seems like an easygoing sort, so hopefully he wasn't too mortified. Most likely he'll snicker through the next few services and rehearsals, as will I. Nothing like gettin' to know somebody, huh??
It was one of those absurd moments in life. One of those times you never could have dreamed or made up on your own. A moment when you MUST laugh... or else cry. Perhaps a moment that makes life a little sillier and reminds me that all of us, regardless of how hard we try to be dignified, drip from time to time.
Ah well... welcome to Riverside, new music guy. May your voice be louder, your guitar strings always in tune. Bet you didn't know it was the land of milk and honey. Or well... at least milk.
My milk let down.
EVERY mother who has ever nursed a baby just cracked up. And I'm not even to the good part yet. For everyone who has NOT nursed a baby, the "let down" is a reflex in a nursing mother's body that causes milk to be pretty much forced out. It usually happens when the baby is nursing, but sometimes can be triggered by other things, like too much time away from the baby, a thought of the baby or another crying baby. It's a very cool thing God built into a female in order to ensure proper nourishment for her infants. It is not, however, all that cool to experience letdown when one is not nursing, but is in conversation with a new music director, or any other person for that matter.
So the milk let down without warning, and suddenly, midsentence, I feel the drips. That's right. Drips. I look down and sure enough, white drops were coming through my shirt and splashing onto my lap. It looked as if... well... as if there was milk coming out of me, dripping through my shirt and onto my lap. It didn't help to have a black shirt on, which effectively highlighted the white substance dripping off of me.
Uh... WHAT do you say at a time like this??? Do I excuse myself? Do I attempt to make an explanation? Do we both sit there and act like nothing's happening?
I managed a "Oops, I'm dripping. Sorry." and quickly crossed my arms, hoping to slow the flow if you know what I mean. I have no clue if new music guy caught what I said or even noticed what happened. Part of me dares to dream he didn't notice. Part of me knows he probably did and is probably embarrassed to pieces. I mean, I really don't know this guy too well. He seems like an easygoing sort, so hopefully he wasn't too mortified. Most likely he'll snicker through the next few services and rehearsals, as will I. Nothing like gettin' to know somebody, huh??
It was one of those absurd moments in life. One of those times you never could have dreamed or made up on your own. A moment when you MUST laugh... or else cry. Perhaps a moment that makes life a little sillier and reminds me that all of us, regardless of how hard we try to be dignified, drip from time to time.
Ah well... welcome to Riverside, new music guy. May your voice be louder, your guitar strings always in tune. Bet you didn't know it was the land of milk and honey. Or well... at least milk.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Gifts and Friends and Falls
Friendship 911:
Me: "Can I come by for like, 5 minutes?"
Janet: "Only if you don't care that I'm in my nightgown and haven't had a shower."
Me: "That's ok. I'm coming by to take my pants off anyway."
Janet: (Knowing she'll get the whole story when I get there) "Ok."
This emergency phone call was placed by me yesterday after an unfortunate incident in the Winn Dixie parking lot just down the street from Janet's house. I had dropped off the kids at school, then stopped by work with a hungry baby to feed him in Dwayne's office before I ran some more errands. I got caught at work in a thunderstorm, but waited it out, determined to get some things done. So, I FINALLY headed off to the Winn Dixie with freshly fed, sleeping baby in the car.
I parked strategically in the side of the parking lot by the exit doors and proceeded to get the baby out. Upon stepping up to the rear passenger door, I noticed a large pothole under the car. (If you live in New Orleans, you know that potholes are a way of life here.) "Better not step in that" I thought to myself. So I leaned precariously over it and picked up the car seat with still sleeping baby inside. I stepped back, however the curb that was behind me evidently had issues with being stepped on. It tripped me. In what seemed to be slow motion I fought against the inevitable backward fall, but was unsuccessful. I fell backward right on my behind. (Thankfully on my freshly unpregnant but still carrying extra cushion behind) Car seat with still sleeping baby fell too, right on top of me, I'm grateful to say.
Now on a dry day in New orleans, sitting on the ground will give you a wet rear end. If you recall the above mentioned thunderstorm, however, then you can imagine how wet and muddy my behind was as a result of my plop onto the grassy curb. A kindly older gentleman witnessed my mishap and came running over to help me up. He assisted me back to my feet and I smiled bravely to assure him he could go his merry way. Then I put car seat with the still sleeping baby back into the car and, hands shaking, got back into the drivers seat. My first plan was to go home. But then my inner rebel kicked in and completely refused to be defeated. I was NOT going to go all the way home, change, and start over. Neither could I enter WinnDixie in my current state.
This brings me to the phone call referenced above. A plan had begun to form in my mind. Janet lives right down the street. Now Janet is one of those friends who has seen many of my worst moments. She's just plain real and just plain there for me. She is one of few that has withheld judgement from me and simply been a friend. You can't surprise her and you can't shock her. So I knew it would be nothing to call her and ask to come over and strip off my pants. Actually, I've been blessed with an unusually high number of this kind of friend in my life. Perhaps God knew how much help and understanding I would need. For whatever reason, He has chosen to give me the gift of amazing friends, and has provided them wherever I've gone. Some from childhood (that's you, C!) and some from college, some from churches here and there, and some my mother bore herself!!
So I proceeded to Janet's where she came up with an ingenious plan of her own. I stood in the bathroom doorway while she blow-dried my butt. I didn't even have to take off the pants. She sent me out the door in decent enough shape so still sleeping baby and I could accomplish our desperately needed grocery run.
I didn't know until the next day when two huge bruises appeared and some stiffness was felt, that I had had a fairly serious fall. It's kinda like life. Here's something I have learned: I can't and neither do I want to, spend this life doing it all on my own. Sometimes I don't know how bad it is until the shock wears off. Sometimes I need help, sometimes I need advice, sometimes I need a shoulder to cry on, and sometimes I need someone to blow dry my butt. Today, especially as I'm entering a new phase in life and trying to make hard decisions I'm exceedingly grateful for those angels God has given me, and grateful for the opportunities I've had to be an angel for someone else. So many thanks to those of you who have been and are there for me. Thanks for letting me call and cry. Thanks for being mad when somebody hurts me. Thanks for loving my kids. Thanks for cheering when I have a success. Thanks for not cheering when you were right and I wasn't. You are one of my most precious gifts. If you're ever in New Orleans and need someone to blow dry your butt... just call.
Me: "Can I come by for like, 5 minutes?"
Janet: "Only if you don't care that I'm in my nightgown and haven't had a shower."
Me: "That's ok. I'm coming by to take my pants off anyway."
Janet: (Knowing she'll get the whole story when I get there) "Ok."
This emergency phone call was placed by me yesterday after an unfortunate incident in the Winn Dixie parking lot just down the street from Janet's house. I had dropped off the kids at school, then stopped by work with a hungry baby to feed him in Dwayne's office before I ran some more errands. I got caught at work in a thunderstorm, but waited it out, determined to get some things done. So, I FINALLY headed off to the Winn Dixie with freshly fed, sleeping baby in the car.
I parked strategically in the side of the parking lot by the exit doors and proceeded to get the baby out. Upon stepping up to the rear passenger door, I noticed a large pothole under the car. (If you live in New Orleans, you know that potholes are a way of life here.) "Better not step in that" I thought to myself. So I leaned precariously over it and picked up the car seat with still sleeping baby inside. I stepped back, however the curb that was behind me evidently had issues with being stepped on. It tripped me. In what seemed to be slow motion I fought against the inevitable backward fall, but was unsuccessful. I fell backward right on my behind. (Thankfully on my freshly unpregnant but still carrying extra cushion behind) Car seat with still sleeping baby fell too, right on top of me, I'm grateful to say.
Now on a dry day in New orleans, sitting on the ground will give you a wet rear end. If you recall the above mentioned thunderstorm, however, then you can imagine how wet and muddy my behind was as a result of my plop onto the grassy curb. A kindly older gentleman witnessed my mishap and came running over to help me up. He assisted me back to my feet and I smiled bravely to assure him he could go his merry way. Then I put car seat with the still sleeping baby back into the car and, hands shaking, got back into the drivers seat. My first plan was to go home. But then my inner rebel kicked in and completely refused to be defeated. I was NOT going to go all the way home, change, and start over. Neither could I enter WinnDixie in my current state.
This brings me to the phone call referenced above. A plan had begun to form in my mind. Janet lives right down the street. Now Janet is one of those friends who has seen many of my worst moments. She's just plain real and just plain there for me. She is one of few that has withheld judgement from me and simply been a friend. You can't surprise her and you can't shock her. So I knew it would be nothing to call her and ask to come over and strip off my pants. Actually, I've been blessed with an unusually high number of this kind of friend in my life. Perhaps God knew how much help and understanding I would need. For whatever reason, He has chosen to give me the gift of amazing friends, and has provided them wherever I've gone. Some from childhood (that's you, C!) and some from college, some from churches here and there, and some my mother bore herself!!
So I proceeded to Janet's where she came up with an ingenious plan of her own. I stood in the bathroom doorway while she blow-dried my butt. I didn't even have to take off the pants. She sent me out the door in decent enough shape so still sleeping baby and I could accomplish our desperately needed grocery run.
I didn't know until the next day when two huge bruises appeared and some stiffness was felt, that I had had a fairly serious fall. It's kinda like life. Here's something I have learned: I can't and neither do I want to, spend this life doing it all on my own. Sometimes I don't know how bad it is until the shock wears off. Sometimes I need help, sometimes I need advice, sometimes I need a shoulder to cry on, and sometimes I need someone to blow dry my butt. Today, especially as I'm entering a new phase in life and trying to make hard decisions I'm exceedingly grateful for those angels God has given me, and grateful for the opportunities I've had to be an angel for someone else. So many thanks to those of you who have been and are there for me. Thanks for letting me call and cry. Thanks for being mad when somebody hurts me. Thanks for loving my kids. Thanks for cheering when I have a success. Thanks for not cheering when you were right and I wasn't. You are one of my most precious gifts. If you're ever in New Orleans and need someone to blow dry your butt... just call.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The Birth
In the tradition of all new mothers who want and need to tell their war stories, and to preserve it while I can still remember vividly... here's the story of Caleb's birth...
February 11, we had a doctor's appointment in the morning. We waltzed in at 9:30 and I had only the smallest glimmer of hope that the doctor might say it was time and we could go ahead and deliver. I even skipped my lovenox injection that morning, hoping against hope, having had enough of heartburn, backache, and that feeling of your hips about to fall apart completely. And sure enough... ultrasound wand in hand, my fairy godmother of a perinatologist said "Not enough fluid. Time to take baby today." I looked at Dwayne and gave him the thumbs up. He freaked.
So while they called my OB, we started on the call list, letting everyone know it was time, and setting the plan in motion. We finally got settled in a Labor and Delivery suite and by around 2:00 pm, out came the pitocin. Dreaded drug of every mother who has experienced it's excruciation. (Is that a word? Is now, I guess!!) I had decided if I ended up needing pitocin that I was going to opt for an epidural. So the nurse sent for anesthesia. No dice. Evidently epidurals can't be administered until 24 hours after a lovenox injection at the risk of paralysis. Unfortunately the pitocin was dripping into my IV already and labor had begun. It wasn't so bad.... yet. But I was scared out of my mind. Laboring on pitocin with no pain relief was NOT in my plan.
I set myself a goal to hang in there until 9:30pm, my 24 hour mark, so I could get that epidural. Ha. Ha ha ha. Around about 5:00 or so, things started to intensify. The kids had all been hanging out in the room with me and I was tolerating contractions really well, but at this point it was getting intense and I wasn't sure I wanted my little ones (or big ones) to see me that way. They went to grab some food and while they were gone, Dwayne helped me to the bathroom. Something about standing up made things shift into overdrive. I had a couple of contractions on that bathroom trip that nearly had me on the floor. Thank goodness my man can hold me up!
He got the nurse and she checked dilation. 8 centimeters. At this point I'm squeezing the crap out of Dwayne's hand and the tears are starting. The nurse offered me Stadol, saying it would take the edge off and would only last about an hour or so. I agreed, thinking it would get me through to 9:30. Ha. Ha ha ha.
So in goes the Stadol through the IV and while the nurse injects it, I tell her: "OK, I'm not pushing, but my body is. My body is pushing the baby out." She takes this as a tip that I might be ready to push. Hmmm... Another dilation check and sure enough! 10 Centimeters!! Call the OB!! He runs over and through a Stadol haze, I could see them bringing in delivery equipment. The part about taking the edge off? I'm not so sure. But Stadol does produce intoxication. That I know.
My husband was still holding my hand and reassuring me, drying my tears as usual. I heard the doc say "You can push now." Out came Caleb's head, and one more push, out came his body. I opened my heavy eyelids and my beautiful son was there. Doctor Hogan put him on my chest and Dwayne cut the cord. Then we both cried. Actually all three of us cried! We did it!
We brought all our kids in to see him, Nathan, Jessica (Caleb's godmother and sister in law), Mackenzie, Levi and Mel (Dwayne's nephew and Caleb's godfather). We all spent a few minutes together before Caleb had to go to the nursery because of his breathing.
In hindsight, the Stadol totally wasn't worth it. Didn't help the pain that much and it made me intoxicated for my son's first moments. A fact I regretted intensely when he ended up in NICU and I couldn't hold him or feed him whenever I wanted. I cried and cried. But looking back, my memory of the experience is fairly clear. I'm thankful to be able to remember in spite of the drug fog.
All in all, a gorgeous little son has been born. A miracle. My Caleb had to fight to get here and fight to stay and fight he did, just like his namesake Caleb in the Bible. Our family is overjoyed and I'm having too much fun being a mommy of a newborn again. Here we are:
February 11, we had a doctor's appointment in the morning. We waltzed in at 9:30 and I had only the smallest glimmer of hope that the doctor might say it was time and we could go ahead and deliver. I even skipped my lovenox injection that morning, hoping against hope, having had enough of heartburn, backache, and that feeling of your hips about to fall apart completely. And sure enough... ultrasound wand in hand, my fairy godmother of a perinatologist said "Not enough fluid. Time to take baby today." I looked at Dwayne and gave him the thumbs up. He freaked.
So while they called my OB, we started on the call list, letting everyone know it was time, and setting the plan in motion. We finally got settled in a Labor and Delivery suite and by around 2:00 pm, out came the pitocin. Dreaded drug of every mother who has experienced it's excruciation. (Is that a word? Is now, I guess!!) I had decided if I ended up needing pitocin that I was going to opt for an epidural. So the nurse sent for anesthesia. No dice. Evidently epidurals can't be administered until 24 hours after a lovenox injection at the risk of paralysis. Unfortunately the pitocin was dripping into my IV already and labor had begun. It wasn't so bad.... yet. But I was scared out of my mind. Laboring on pitocin with no pain relief was NOT in my plan.
I set myself a goal to hang in there until 9:30pm, my 24 hour mark, so I could get that epidural. Ha. Ha ha ha. Around about 5:00 or so, things started to intensify. The kids had all been hanging out in the room with me and I was tolerating contractions really well, but at this point it was getting intense and I wasn't sure I wanted my little ones (or big ones) to see me that way. They went to grab some food and while they were gone, Dwayne helped me to the bathroom. Something about standing up made things shift into overdrive. I had a couple of contractions on that bathroom trip that nearly had me on the floor. Thank goodness my man can hold me up!
He got the nurse and she checked dilation. 8 centimeters. At this point I'm squeezing the crap out of Dwayne's hand and the tears are starting. The nurse offered me Stadol, saying it would take the edge off and would only last about an hour or so. I agreed, thinking it would get me through to 9:30. Ha. Ha ha ha.
So in goes the Stadol through the IV and while the nurse injects it, I tell her: "OK, I'm not pushing, but my body is. My body is pushing the baby out." She takes this as a tip that I might be ready to push. Hmmm... Another dilation check and sure enough! 10 Centimeters!! Call the OB!! He runs over and through a Stadol haze, I could see them bringing in delivery equipment. The part about taking the edge off? I'm not so sure. But Stadol does produce intoxication. That I know.
My husband was still holding my hand and reassuring me, drying my tears as usual. I heard the doc say "You can push now." Out came Caleb's head, and one more push, out came his body. I opened my heavy eyelids and my beautiful son was there. Doctor Hogan put him on my chest and Dwayne cut the cord. Then we both cried. Actually all three of us cried! We did it!
We brought all our kids in to see him, Nathan, Jessica (Caleb's godmother and sister in law), Mackenzie, Levi and Mel (Dwayne's nephew and Caleb's godfather). We all spent a few minutes together before Caleb had to go to the nursery because of his breathing.
In hindsight, the Stadol totally wasn't worth it. Didn't help the pain that much and it made me intoxicated for my son's first moments. A fact I regretted intensely when he ended up in NICU and I couldn't hold him or feed him whenever I wanted. I cried and cried. But looking back, my memory of the experience is fairly clear. I'm thankful to be able to remember in spite of the drug fog.
All in all, a gorgeous little son has been born. A miracle. My Caleb had to fight to get here and fight to stay and fight he did, just like his namesake Caleb in the Bible. Our family is overjoyed and I'm having too much fun being a mommy of a newborn again. Here we are:
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Day five
Day five at home. I have to admit I'm a little overwhelmed. I'm not sure why. I mean, I've done this before. Twice. I have two beautiful, healthy, amazing kids to show for it. Part of me just tries to look ahead to when mom is gone and real life sets in. How will I get everyone in the car and to school on time? How will I ever go back to work?
Now, I know that's silly thinking. I'll do it somehow. And I'll feel better and better in the next few weeks. It'll happen. I can't let those thoughts come in and take away the joy of these moments.
So it's time to refocus. Refocus on baby smiles while he sleeps, tiny diapers, fuzzy hair on his head, tiny fingers and toes, and looking right into his eyes while he nurses. Refocus on how proud his daddy is and how tiny he looks in his daddy's hands, how he turns his head to check out what his big brother and sister are up to, and how he has a fancy crib but prefers my arms every time.
And refocus on taking a nap while he naps... g'night.
Now, I know that's silly thinking. I'll do it somehow. And I'll feel better and better in the next few weeks. It'll happen. I can't let those thoughts come in and take away the joy of these moments.
So it's time to refocus. Refocus on baby smiles while he sleeps, tiny diapers, fuzzy hair on his head, tiny fingers and toes, and looking right into his eyes while he nurses. Refocus on how proud his daddy is and how tiny he looks in his daddy's hands, how he turns his head to check out what his big brother and sister are up to, and how he has a fancy crib but prefers my arms every time.
And refocus on taking a nap while he naps... g'night.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
We Are Home!
Caleb is home! We brought him home yesterday, Mardi Gras Day! He's doing very well. We are blessed to have endured 5 scary days with virtually no scrapes or bruises. Caleb was born quickly. VERY quickly. As in two measly pushes quickly. One for the head, one for the rest of him. He had some breathing trouble and was diagnosed with TTN. This is common in newborns who are born by C-section or who are born very quickly. It takes a few days for the lungs to catch up with the fact that they are no longer inside mom but on the outside with the job of breathing actual air.
So gradually his breathing stabilized, and we were discharged from the NICU on Mardi Gras Day. We are exhausted but so happy to be home. My mom is here and taking care of the kids and me. Dwayne, the super proud daddy is back to work after spending five days taking the most awesome care of me and Caleb. And I'm nursing for all I'm worth and trying to sleep some in between. We are so thankful for your prayers and love. More later! WITH pictures, I promise.
So gradually his breathing stabilized, and we were discharged from the NICU on Mardi Gras Day. We are exhausted but so happy to be home. My mom is here and taking care of the kids and me. Dwayne, the super proud daddy is back to work after spending five days taking the most awesome care of me and Caleb. And I'm nursing for all I'm worth and trying to sleep some in between. We are so thankful for your prayers and love. More later! WITH pictures, I promise.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Caleb is born!!!
Caleb Paul Jeffries Hyman was born February 11, 2010 at 7:05pm. 5lb,5oz, 18 in. long. We had about 30 minutes with him before he was whisked away, and then ended up in NICU. Having a little breathing trouble. He's improving every day. Thanks to everybody for calling and checking in on us. Please be patient if we can't call you back or keep things as updated as we'd like. Our days right now are nothing but trips to the hospital, pumping breast milk, trying to recover and praying for our little man. We are exhausted but thankful. My Mom is here and taking good care of big sister Mackenzie and big brother Levi.
Love to you all, and we will update as soon as we can. Praying and hoping to bring Caleb home by Tuesday.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
IT IS DONE!
I totally just watched the Saints win the Superbowl!!! WOW! I'm not one to buy all the hype and the destiny this and that. However, I just can't help being a little emotional on this one. It just plain feels awesome to see a dream come true. A good thing has happened to a city of passionate, fun-loving people and most of them are crying like babies with the joy of it. (and the beer of course)
Sometimes life brings along enough bad stuff that it makes you kind of scared to hope for something good to happen. It's nice to see an impossibility become possible, a glimmer of hope actually become reality, to live through a victory no one thought would ever come.
Too cool. Too cool that my kids witnessed a historic event and the courage of a city whose tragedy they also experienced. Too cool that my new baby will be born the year the Saints won the Superbowl. Too cool to see the stuff of a hollywood movie happen for real in front of my eyes. Yay, Saints! Bless You Boys!!
Sometimes life brings along enough bad stuff that it makes you kind of scared to hope for something good to happen. It's nice to see an impossibility become possible, a glimmer of hope actually become reality, to live through a victory no one thought would ever come.
Too cool. Too cool that my kids witnessed a historic event and the courage of a city whose tragedy they also experienced. Too cool that my new baby will be born the year the Saints won the Superbowl. Too cool to see the stuff of a hollywood movie happen for real in front of my eyes. Yay, Saints! Bless You Boys!!
Friday, February 05, 2010
Monday, February 01, 2010
Countdown
The end of pregnancy can be like the longest, most torturous countdown there is. It's the wierdest mix of giddy anticipation and adrenaline-pumping, nerves-on-end vigilance that there is. Just for fun, and to let off some steam, here's what the countdown looks like at our house:
10: Find a spot on your belly with no bruise to administer your blood thinner shot. "Honey? Can you look under there and tell me where there's no bruise?"
9: Try to get a couple of consecutive hours of sleep. No dice. Run yourself a warm bath at 2am out of pain and sheer boredom. One can only watch Teen Mom on MTV in the middle of the night so many times. Make involuntary popping noises and cries of pain when attempting to roll over in bed. Husband wakes up. "Baby, you ok?"
8: Cry hysterically for a reason. Cry hysterically again for no reason at all. Husband wakes up again. "Baby, you ok?"
7: Notice how everyone who sees you immediately looks down at the middle section of your body which currently doesn't appear to be physically possible. Either they're looking at that or I'm WAY sexier than I thought I was. Husband looks too. "Baby, you are beautiful!"
6: Be INSANELY protective and emotional over your existing beautiful children. Tear up when your seven year old boy throws his arms around your huge belly, and giggle with your twelve year old girl when she feels the baby kick. Watch their gorgeous heads of hair disappear around the corner as they walk into school with their friends. Grab the tissues and have your very own Hallmark commercial right there.
5: Go over every possible going-into-labor scenario with your husband until you both are delirious or delusional with anticipation. While doing so, realize that what will actually happen is COMPLETELY unknown and out of your control. Continue delusions and delirium. Finally try to decide to be happy and enjoy WHATEVER happens.
4: Wash, fold, and put away all your baby stuff. Then REALLY hope the determination is accurate and it really is a boy. Sit in your rocking chair and stare at all the baby stuff. Sit pretty much anywhere and stare.
3: Miss your mother like you never knew was possible. Cry some more to your very patient and understanding husband. "Baby, it's ok."
2: Feel nauseated and want nothing to eat at all. Then eat everything you can get your hands on.
1: Feel and watch baby Caleb moving around in there and think how much you will miss this miracle after he's born. Sit back, relax and wait for it...
BLASTOFF!!
10: Find a spot on your belly with no bruise to administer your blood thinner shot. "Honey? Can you look under there and tell me where there's no bruise?"
9: Try to get a couple of consecutive hours of sleep. No dice. Run yourself a warm bath at 2am out of pain and sheer boredom. One can only watch Teen Mom on MTV in the middle of the night so many times. Make involuntary popping noises and cries of pain when attempting to roll over in bed. Husband wakes up. "Baby, you ok?"
8: Cry hysterically for a reason. Cry hysterically again for no reason at all. Husband wakes up again. "Baby, you ok?"
7: Notice how everyone who sees you immediately looks down at the middle section of your body which currently doesn't appear to be physically possible. Either they're looking at that or I'm WAY sexier than I thought I was. Husband looks too. "Baby, you are beautiful!"
6: Be INSANELY protective and emotional over your existing beautiful children. Tear up when your seven year old boy throws his arms around your huge belly, and giggle with your twelve year old girl when she feels the baby kick. Watch their gorgeous heads of hair disappear around the corner as they walk into school with their friends. Grab the tissues and have your very own Hallmark commercial right there.
5: Go over every possible going-into-labor scenario with your husband until you both are delirious or delusional with anticipation. While doing so, realize that what will actually happen is COMPLETELY unknown and out of your control. Continue delusions and delirium. Finally try to decide to be happy and enjoy WHATEVER happens.
4: Wash, fold, and put away all your baby stuff. Then REALLY hope the determination is accurate and it really is a boy. Sit in your rocking chair and stare at all the baby stuff. Sit pretty much anywhere and stare.
3: Miss your mother like you never knew was possible. Cry some more to your very patient and understanding husband. "Baby, it's ok."
2: Feel nauseated and want nothing to eat at all. Then eat everything you can get your hands on.
1: Feel and watch baby Caleb moving around in there and think how much you will miss this miracle after he's born. Sit back, relax and wait for it...
BLASTOFF!!
Friday, January 29, 2010
Bliss
It's been WAY too long since I did this.
My life is full of little blisses. Last night, a long conversation with a friend who is walking through what I walked through 2 years ago made me remember. How did you get through? He asked. I focused on life's smallest joys. That was really the main thing I did. And I've quit doing it as much as I should. Smiles come my way through:
A big yellow dog with hair all over my boy after they play.
My very own chef who makes me pancakes on his day off.
Selfsame chef who puts up with me tossing and turning all night and wakes up to see if I need anything, and then still gets up on his day off to help me get the kids ready.
A primping twelve year old girl who borrows my necklace and my lotion.
My Sugarland CD. Turned up LOUD.
Starbucks Venti Passion Tea, Iced with an extra shot of sweet, baby!
Lunch with a friend
Mardi Gras!! And KING CAKE!!
A short list, but effective. Enjoy your own blisses today!
My life is full of little blisses. Last night, a long conversation with a friend who is walking through what I walked through 2 years ago made me remember. How did you get through? He asked. I focused on life's smallest joys. That was really the main thing I did. And I've quit doing it as much as I should. Smiles come my way through:
A big yellow dog with hair all over my boy after they play.
My very own chef who makes me pancakes on his day off.
Selfsame chef who puts up with me tossing and turning all night and wakes up to see if I need anything, and then still gets up on his day off to help me get the kids ready.
A primping twelve year old girl who borrows my necklace and my lotion.
My Sugarland CD. Turned up LOUD.
Starbucks Venti Passion Tea, Iced with an extra shot of sweet, baby!
Lunch with a friend
Mardi Gras!! And KING CAKE!!
A short list, but effective. Enjoy your own blisses today!
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
New Year
The New Year has begun. Though I must confess, it snuck up on me!! (Is snuck a word? I don't really think so, but oh well.... "sneaked" doesn't really sound better and I don't have time to look it up.) Back to the point...our New Year's Eve was spent sick in bed with a stomach flu. My husband had it first, so by New Year's Eve, he was taking his turn as caregiver to me and I was doing my best to get over it so we could go pick up the kids. We took it easy and made the trip to FL and back, bringing our little loves home. The kids had a fun visit to FL for the most part, though there were some not so great moments and I find myself facing big challenges helping my children deal with those. I HATE, and I do mean ABSOLUTELY HATE the fact that my children must be out of my care. Hurtful things happen to them that I can't prevent. I know reality is I'll never be able to prevent all of life's pain for my children, never really could, but it still sucks, plain and simple.
However, they're home now and getting back to their usual wonderful crazy selves. We are lovin' it. Our home is full of so much laughter. Dwayne and I laugh a lot anyway, and the kids join in with one antic or another, and then add our big ol' dog to the mix and we are a crazy bunch. Now we're getting all set up for baby Caleb and ready to add little brother. Never a dull moment indeed.
I'm finding that I really love building a home here in New Orleans... with a New Orleanian. "Let the good times roll!" isn't just a saying here, it's a way of life, and is a big part of our life. I love my Florida roots, my upbringing there was priceless. I'm also loving bringing up my kids with those same good ol' values mixed with a zest and love for life that can't be found anywhere but the Big Easy.
The last few years have been nothing short of hell on earth for me and my babies. We've seen a lot of bad... and a lot of good too. Though my new year came in quietly, without much observation at all, I'm still happy for the newness and renewal brought about by another January. My new family is getting stronger (and larger!) by the minute, and we are moving into a bright future together. My goal, if any, for this year? Make the MOST of every minute. Revel in every happiness. Appreciate every moment of joy, every little hug, every loving touch, every second of laughter with the ones I love. That's it. And really... what else is there?
To all of you: Let the good times roll!! Happy New Year!!
However, they're home now and getting back to their usual wonderful crazy selves. We are lovin' it. Our home is full of so much laughter. Dwayne and I laugh a lot anyway, and the kids join in with one antic or another, and then add our big ol' dog to the mix and we are a crazy bunch. Now we're getting all set up for baby Caleb and ready to add little brother. Never a dull moment indeed.
I'm finding that I really love building a home here in New Orleans... with a New Orleanian. "Let the good times roll!" isn't just a saying here, it's a way of life, and is a big part of our life. I love my Florida roots, my upbringing there was priceless. I'm also loving bringing up my kids with those same good ol' values mixed with a zest and love for life that can't be found anywhere but the Big Easy.
The last few years have been nothing short of hell on earth for me and my babies. We've seen a lot of bad... and a lot of good too. Though my new year came in quietly, without much observation at all, I'm still happy for the newness and renewal brought about by another January. My new family is getting stronger (and larger!) by the minute, and we are moving into a bright future together. My goal, if any, for this year? Make the MOST of every minute. Revel in every happiness. Appreciate every moment of joy, every little hug, every loving touch, every second of laughter with the ones I love. That's it. And really... what else is there?
To all of you: Let the good times roll!! Happy New Year!!
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Christmas Season
Merry Christmas! Two days late, I know.
My children are in Florida and I am in Louisiana. So I shed a few tears on Christmas since my heart misses them so much. But I talked to them on the phone twice, and will see them in a matter of days. Our doggie misses them too. He searches their beds, and cries, and comes to me with the most mournful look on his face, nudges me desperately, like, "DO something!!! WHERE ARE MY KIDS???!!!" Crazy dog! Can't say I blame him, though. Had I the K-9 excuse, I'd behave the very self-same way. However, I must soldier on like the human I try to be and endure this, making the most of it, and that's what I'm trying to do.
My Christmas was a quiet one, and I must say, quite enjoyable. I spent it bonding with my sweet husband. We needed this time and we are enjoying every second of it. Christmas Eve at my stepson's house where baby Caleb is already getting spoiled by his big brother and sister in law. We had Christmas dinner at his brother's and enjoyed the most eclectic cultural Christmas of my life. My sister in law is Thai, and so we had turkey next to the egg rolls, next to the ham, next to the noodles. Thai karaoke and New Orleans accents and crazy kids everywhere... and a little bit of Polk county redneck girl (me). Fun!
My man got me a spa day for Christmas and so I spent yesterday sprawled in a pedicure chair, white chocolate cappucino in hand, totally relaxing. I needed it. Funny thing, I happened to be one of three pregnant ladies in the salon all at the same time. Picture three very pregnant people sprawled in pedicure chairs and the place looked more like a maternity ward than an upscale spa. It turned some heads for sure! Too funny.
All in all, a Christmas to be cherished, since most of it was spent in the arms of the one I love, curled up by our fireplace getting closer and dreaming and building a stronger foundation for our family. And kissing too!! :) What's a good Christmas without some serious kissing, I always say.
To all of you out there, Merry, merry merry Christmas season. (Which, according to my bestie, Christy, lasts until epiphany, and I wholeheartedly agree!!!)
My children are in Florida and I am in Louisiana. So I shed a few tears on Christmas since my heart misses them so much. But I talked to them on the phone twice, and will see them in a matter of days. Our doggie misses them too. He searches their beds, and cries, and comes to me with the most mournful look on his face, nudges me desperately, like, "DO something!!! WHERE ARE MY KIDS???!!!" Crazy dog! Can't say I blame him, though. Had I the K-9 excuse, I'd behave the very self-same way. However, I must soldier on like the human I try to be and endure this, making the most of it, and that's what I'm trying to do.
My Christmas was a quiet one, and I must say, quite enjoyable. I spent it bonding with my sweet husband. We needed this time and we are enjoying every second of it. Christmas Eve at my stepson's house where baby Caleb is already getting spoiled by his big brother and sister in law. We had Christmas dinner at his brother's and enjoyed the most eclectic cultural Christmas of my life. My sister in law is Thai, and so we had turkey next to the egg rolls, next to the ham, next to the noodles. Thai karaoke and New Orleans accents and crazy kids everywhere... and a little bit of Polk county redneck girl (me). Fun!
My man got me a spa day for Christmas and so I spent yesterday sprawled in a pedicure chair, white chocolate cappucino in hand, totally relaxing. I needed it. Funny thing, I happened to be one of three pregnant ladies in the salon all at the same time. Picture three very pregnant people sprawled in pedicure chairs and the place looked more like a maternity ward than an upscale spa. It turned some heads for sure! Too funny.
All in all, a Christmas to be cherished, since most of it was spent in the arms of the one I love, curled up by our fireplace getting closer and dreaming and building a stronger foundation for our family. And kissing too!! :) What's a good Christmas without some serious kissing, I always say.
To all of you out there, Merry, merry merry Christmas season. (Which, according to my bestie, Christy, lasts until epiphany, and I wholeheartedly agree!!!)
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Missing Heart Report
Well, my heart has officially exited my body and is walking around down in Florida. I put my kids on a plane Thursday. Their first plane ride alone. They cried. I cried. We are gonna miss each other!! Two weeks will not pass quickly enough.
But they did it! They called back so proud of themselves. They had a good flight, and made it there safe and sound. It's hard not to be blue. I'm doing my best to enjoy my last hurrah alone with my hubby before new baby arrives. I still miss my babies, though. I have two very brave, very wonderful children.
Now... the Saints are about to kick off. It's time to watch some football!!
But they did it! They called back so proud of themselves. They had a good flight, and made it there safe and sound. It's hard not to be blue. I'm doing my best to enjoy my last hurrah alone with my hubby before new baby arrives. I still miss my babies, though. I have two very brave, very wonderful children.
Now... the Saints are about to kick off. It's time to watch some football!!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
A Decision
Today I'm decorating Gingerbread men. I have seven days until my babies have to leave me for Christmas, and the Christmasing has begun. We have an action packed weekend coming up and what better way to kick off than Gingerbread men? And a visit to the doctor to hear our baby's heartbeat. Frustrations are officially going to the back burner, and I mean the very back. I have a gorgeous husband who is nuts about me, I have two amazing children on the outside and one inside. It's Christmastime and we have each other... and gingerbread men. All other crap must wait until I am finished relishing every second with my precious ones.
Let's do it!!
Let's do it!!
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
Taking Advice
Levi on tattling:
"Robert ALWAYS has to do that. He tells on somebody ALL the time, he always has to have something to tell on. It's like "DUDE... take a break!!"
I SO feel his pain. There is something going on right now that makes my heart say "Seriously???? I mean, REALLY??? After everything you have already done to me and my children... now this????" It's like "DUDE... take a break!"
Maybe it's the size of my belly, and the size of the hormone surges I'm having. Maybe it's exhaustion or fear or whatever. I'm just having trouble finding my usual look-on-the-bright-side attitude. I'm frustrated with people and humanity and the general stupidity of a person who unfortunately has influence on my babies. Honestly, I'm frustrated with God a little too. It's not like He doesn't already know this, so don't you freak out ok? I just feel like I tried to honor Him through forgiveness and through sticking out a marriage that was doomed. I tried to be the hero, to forgive when it wasn't deserved, to keep going when no one knew how I was suffering. I tried to hold it all together, for the sake of my family and for the sake of His church. And now... this situation just continues to plague me, even after I've finally been released from it and gone on toward wholeness.
I feel like crying out for mercy from this. I feel like asking "How long? and WHY???" Mostly I also feel frustrated that no one seems to be caring what is best for my children. Perhaps pregnancy has me feeling SUPER maternal right now, but I just can't get over how precious my children are, and how undeserved all of their suffering has been. WHO's looking out for them?? Well, me and God that's who. But still I wish I could make other people wake up and realize that they are really what is important.
Ugh. I'm tired of all this, and tired of being tired of it. I want to go on with my life and love my husband and enjoy our new baby. And that I will do. We all will.
Perhaps I should take Levi's advice after all. I mean "Dude... take a break!" isn't a bad sounding deal. Maybe a break and a little perspective will help... and some chinese food...
:)
"Robert ALWAYS has to do that. He tells on somebody ALL the time, he always has to have something to tell on. It's like "DUDE... take a break!!"
I SO feel his pain. There is something going on right now that makes my heart say "Seriously???? I mean, REALLY??? After everything you have already done to me and my children... now this????" It's like "DUDE... take a break!"
Maybe it's the size of my belly, and the size of the hormone surges I'm having. Maybe it's exhaustion or fear or whatever. I'm just having trouble finding my usual look-on-the-bright-side attitude. I'm frustrated with people and humanity and the general stupidity of a person who unfortunately has influence on my babies. Honestly, I'm frustrated with God a little too. It's not like He doesn't already know this, so don't you freak out ok? I just feel like I tried to honor Him through forgiveness and through sticking out a marriage that was doomed. I tried to be the hero, to forgive when it wasn't deserved, to keep going when no one knew how I was suffering. I tried to hold it all together, for the sake of my family and for the sake of His church. And now... this situation just continues to plague me, even after I've finally been released from it and gone on toward wholeness.
I feel like crying out for mercy from this. I feel like asking "How long? and WHY???" Mostly I also feel frustrated that no one seems to be caring what is best for my children. Perhaps pregnancy has me feeling SUPER maternal right now, but I just can't get over how precious my children are, and how undeserved all of their suffering has been. WHO's looking out for them?? Well, me and God that's who. But still I wish I could make other people wake up and realize that they are really what is important.
Ugh. I'm tired of all this, and tired of being tired of it. I want to go on with my life and love my husband and enjoy our new baby. And that I will do. We all will.
Perhaps I should take Levi's advice after all. I mean "Dude... take a break!" isn't a bad sounding deal. Maybe a break and a little perspective will help... and some chinese food...
:)
Friday, December 04, 2009
Sharin' My Happiness
My dear sweet longtime, knows-all-my-secrets friend, Christy Sallee, took some pics of me and my gorgeous man. Ya know how when you are pregnant you just feel kind of... yucky? Definitely not beautiful. Well, I posed for and Christy took some pics that made me feel BEAUTIFUL. Some I never dreamed I'd dare to take. But I did, and IT WAS SO AWESOME!! C, you did my heart good!!! Some of the ones that are appropriate to share are below. Untouched.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
The Peanut Gallery
Levi: (Commenting on my new back brace to help with lower back and round ligament pain) "Are you gonna wear that all the time?"
Me: "Well, it helps my back feel better."
Levi: "I'm a man. So I don't get back pain. Unless I have a cramp.... Now, preg-i-nit women... (with a shake of his head) THEY get a lot of cramps."
This is pregnancy from a seven year old boy's perspective. I love being "preg-i-nit!"
Me: "Well, it helps my back feel better."
Levi: "I'm a man. So I don't get back pain. Unless I have a cramp.... Now, preg-i-nit women... (with a shake of his head) THEY get a lot of cramps."
This is pregnancy from a seven year old boy's perspective. I love being "preg-i-nit!"
Monday, November 16, 2009
Questions
Just a few questions...
Why does pregnancy make food fall on your clothes? I walk around every day with SOMETHING on my shirt. Am I really that much of a pig?
Why can't I ever, EVER get full? I'm hungry ALL the time!!
How is it that I can be so proud of my daughter and how grown up she is, and want her to come back and be a baby again all at the same time??
Is it really true that a new baby can make me love the babies I already have a million times more?
Why do I expect so much of myself? Why all the perfectionism crap?
Where is my nap?
Where do college students' parents think their children are when they are actually sitting near me and my family on the streetcar wearing next to nothing and acting way too desperate? And how will I keep my daughter from engaging in such?
Why are the people at the coffee shop on Oak Street and Carollton so unfriendly? I mean, you can be bohemian and funky and all... and still be friendly to your customers. GOSH!! All I wanted was a steamer.
Will my son remember walking to the streetcar stop and riding downtown with me and his S-Dad, just for fun? Will he remember all the crazy stuff we can see in this city? Will he know how much fun I had showing it to him?
Why can't we watch Napoleon Dynamite every day? I love that movie!! Are you gonna eat your tots?
How come I'm writing these silly questions when there are a zillion other deep thoughts I could be sharing?
Why can't every day be Monday?
Why do I let people who have done enough to hurt me, and yet somehow still feel entitled to treat me as he, I mean they, please continue to hurt me? I think I'm finished with that.
What are we havin' for Thanksgiving? Pecan pie, I hope. I'd really love some pecan pie right now.
Why don't I spend more time being silly? I haven't been nearly silly enough. There goes that perfectionism again...
Who knows...
And I thought I had all the answers... Turns out I mostly just have questions.
Why does pregnancy make food fall on your clothes? I walk around every day with SOMETHING on my shirt. Am I really that much of a pig?
Why can't I ever, EVER get full? I'm hungry ALL the time!!
How is it that I can be so proud of my daughter and how grown up she is, and want her to come back and be a baby again all at the same time??
Is it really true that a new baby can make me love the babies I already have a million times more?
Why do I expect so much of myself? Why all the perfectionism crap?
Where is my nap?
Where do college students' parents think their children are when they are actually sitting near me and my family on the streetcar wearing next to nothing and acting way too desperate? And how will I keep my daughter from engaging in such?
Why are the people at the coffee shop on Oak Street and Carollton so unfriendly? I mean, you can be bohemian and funky and all... and still be friendly to your customers. GOSH!! All I wanted was a steamer.
Will my son remember walking to the streetcar stop and riding downtown with me and his S-Dad, just for fun? Will he remember all the crazy stuff we can see in this city? Will he know how much fun I had showing it to him?
Why can't we watch Napoleon Dynamite every day? I love that movie!! Are you gonna eat your tots?
How come I'm writing these silly questions when there are a zillion other deep thoughts I could be sharing?
Why can't every day be Monday?
Why do I let people who have done enough to hurt me, and yet somehow still feel entitled to treat me as he, I mean they, please continue to hurt me? I think I'm finished with that.
What are we havin' for Thanksgiving? Pecan pie, I hope. I'd really love some pecan pie right now.
Why don't I spend more time being silly? I haven't been nearly silly enough. There goes that perfectionism again...
Who knows...
And I thought I had all the answers... Turns out I mostly just have questions.
Thursday, November 05, 2009
Baby CALEB!!!
Here's our baby, Caleb!
His face in 4-D.
Here, he's waving hello to his big brother Levi and his big sister, Mackenzie. They had so much fun seeing him on the screen. You can see the side of his head and his profile, but the hand is kind of covering his mouth.
Sorry for the funny way they look, had to scan the hard copies in, but I wanted to get them up here to celebrate! He's growing so well, his heart looks good, kidneys, brain, everything!!! YAY! He does happen to be breech right now, but that can and hopefully will change before time to make his appearance. Any prayers anyone wants to say to that effect will be welcome. Sorry to brag and run, but just had to show my little joy. More later!!
His face in 4-D.
Here, he's waving hello to his big brother Levi and his big sister, Mackenzie. They had so much fun seeing him on the screen. You can see the side of his head and his profile, but the hand is kind of covering his mouth.
Sorry for the funny way they look, had to scan the hard copies in, but I wanted to get them up here to celebrate! He's growing so well, his heart looks good, kidneys, brain, everything!!! YAY! He does happen to be breech right now, but that can and hopefully will change before time to make his appearance. Any prayers anyone wants to say to that effect will be welcome. Sorry to brag and run, but just had to show my little joy. More later!!
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